Interview with an Ally: Late Bloomer

I'd like to introduce a segment of my blog that I hope will become regular, which I like to call "Interview with an Ally". In these segments, I will interview self-identified straight individuals who are allies to LGBT issues about their sexualities to help readers remember that heterosexuality is indeed a sexuality, just like homosexuality, bisexuality, etc. It's not a 'default sexuality' or a 'lack of sexuality', parallel to how many mistakenly assume middle-class white U.S. culture as the default culture, or a 'lack of culture'.

So, let's get started with my first interview with an ally!

Name: Late Bloomer

Age: 22

Race/Ethnicity: Caucasian
Gender: Female
Religion: My 'religion' is sort of up in the air right now haha...I was raised Christian (CMA) and went to a Christian college (Anabaptist) but I would definitely classify myself as 'spiritual' rather than 'religious' now. I don't like saying I'm a 'Christian' because there are so many negative connotations associated with that word, especially to the LGBT community. But, I definitely don't see myself as an Atheist or even classify myself as Agnostic...There are certain principles of Christianity that do I believe in (though they are not always upheld by the mass Christian community), so I guess I would still call myself Christian...I just hate that word! gah!

When and how did you first decide you were a heterosexual?:
Hmmm, I think it was something I always just assumed about myself, not necessarily "decided." I grew up in a small town with absolutely no diversity and I wasn't exposed to homosexuality until high school. This might sound stupid, but I didn't even realize there were "options" other than being straight until I was in my teens! I'm a bit of a "late-bloomer" as far as my sexuality is concerned, so for awhile, I did wonder if I actually might be a lesbian...but I knew for sure I was straight after a few experiences with girls...lol! I still wouldn't say I "decided" I was straight; it was just something I came to realize.

To whom have you disclosed your heterosexual tendencies? How did they react?:
Ha! I think my parents and more conservative friends were relieved when I "revealed" my heterosexual tendencies; they could breathe a sigh of relief that I wasn't gay! (sad, but true)

Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may grow out of?:
To be fair, I have never actually been in a relationship with a man. Right now, I can't picture myself in relationship with a woman, either, but I am definitely attracted to them. I think I will always be attracted to men, but on the Kinsey scale, I'm not 100% straight, either. So, no, my heterosexuality is NOT a phase I will "grow out of," but I AM still exploring my sexuality...so I could potentially end up with a woman someday, too. I'm trying to be open to having a relationship with a *person* regardless of their sex.

What do you think caused your heterosexuality?:
Like everything, it was probably just a combination of genetics and environment :) I don't like the word "caused," however. Who's to say my sexuality was *caused* by anything? I'd like to think it's simply a part of who I am--whether it be straight, gay, bisexual, transgendered, etc. I'm trying to not be so hung up on labels :) I don't think we should have to "define" something so personal and dynamic. My own sexuality is still evolving--Just one reason I choose not to list who I am "interested in" on Facebook :)

Special thanks to Late Bloomer for her courage and insight!

*Questions taken from the Heterosexuality Questionnaire, Attributed to Martin Rochlin, PhD, January 1977*